I made it all winter without a sniffle.
No H1N1, regular old boring flu, sinus infection, bronchitis or even a cold. Nadda.
But in the past two weeks, Scottie, the accidental designer dog, and I have been sneezing our fool heads off. And for what?
Because the trees are fooling around. And they’re not picky with whom or what they do “it” with. Without even first buying dinner and a movie.
They’re just spewing their tree sperm carelessly into the air and hoping some of hits the target, without any concern for the repercussions for the rest of us. Just how wanton can you get? Remind you of any other promiscuous Woods?
Well, that’s the whole problem! I did some research, and there are all sorts of Tiger trees -- black Tiger pines, Tiger apples, Tiger figs, Siberian Tiger trees, Tiger oak, Vermont Tiger, striped Tiger, Tiger maple, Kipahulu Tiger claw trees … get the picture?
And did you notice that all this pollen started flying around about the time that Tiger Woods made his big comeback a couple of weeks ago at the Masters in Augusta? That’s not very far away, as the crow – or pollen – flies.
Say what you will, but I say where there’s sex, there’s Tiger. And while his extramarital affairs may be a personal matter between him and his wife, his personal rights end where my sinuses begin.
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